Breathe.

2009-02-10T10:42:00.002+08:00

I foresee a busy month ahead.
Really busy one.
I just got a part time job as documentation centre assistant.
For the APEC meeting at grand copthorne hotel.
but it's from 7 to 7.Almost everyday until 26 feb.
So will be really busy.Throughout?
feb is really supposed to be a special month.
so i wish myself happy bdae on e 16th in advance.
happy bdae weiting!you're one year older.
boo.
and tmr is mr lee wenjie bdae.hahaha
happy bdae bro.
he prides himself on being 5days older than i am.
oh and it's also valentine on 14!
but there wont be any angel n mortal game this year in school.

now i start to regret a lil about taking up so many jobs..
the tuition agency just also smsed me yesterday to tell me bout jc1 maths tuition.
rawr.
But for the current job i have to work for 12 hours.
so i am virtually only free at night for now.
and i have also 2 other tuition.1 on hold for now though.haha
And chin is coming out from army in 3 days.YAY.
I AM HAPPY.
But i dunno whether i can meet him up on the 13th the friday!
OOOOO OMG.
it's friday the 13th.I just realised.hahahahha gosh..
i am going to start working tmr.TOMORROW.
so if i seem like i am disappearing from the face of the earth,
as how meiyi describes it to be:
i am not.
i am just busy and not able to blog or use facebook?
Facebook is a pretty good way to kill time.
and i named my pet chinchilla.
=D
chin almost fainted.
HAHA.
it was great entertainment for me.xD

2009-02-06T15:07:00.003+08:00

yay i managed to talk to chin for an hour today during his break. =D
i am happy.lolol..but his battery is dying.hahah
ok i am really praying for him to come out on friday afternoon.
then we can go out eat dinner tgt.
*prays really really hard*
(i will be a better person for a day)

okay,i just read the news.
How the uncommon drought ravages china..mainly the northern and central provinces..
so all the winter wheat stock dies.
Rain hasnt fallen on beijing for more than 100 days.
So people,do you know what this all means?
It's a ominous call for drastic actions to be made to save the ailing earth.
For god sake,let's all try our best to curb global warming..
i don't think i am doing enough yet.
I havent been using the aircon since last year.And everytime u don't need to
use the electrical appliances,off the main switch.
ok for monetary reasons it works too.
But it's the earth we are talking about.
I just don't want the future generation to suffer cos of precedent's doings.
And we are feeling the effects already aren't we?
Monsoon season seems to be gone;Last few years it rained at least 3 times as much during these times..but now we don't witness such a phenomenon anymore.
It's all sunny and smiley-But what does such a facade bode for us?

sigh.I really hope that the problem of global warming can be curbed in time
before the tipping point
researches show that at least 60% of our current carbon emission must be curbed before 2050
before it all crumbles.
is it possible?

2009-02-04T13:10:00.003+08:00

i changed the blogskin.This shall stay permanent.
It's finally a lil brighter and less greyish
Like something ominous that looms over my blog.
No more harry potter music that pops out from nowhere,
but a deafening silence that screams.
heh.

in any case,i went out yesterday to bugis nlb.
borrowed books on ethics but i haven't read them yet.
and books on chinese herbs for mum
ah and played mahjong.
i was so tired.
and i received an early present for my bdae this year.
big thank you to the old fren of mine =)
oh and i came home to do more housework.
seriously,i think i am the only one who stays home most of the time..
too lazy to find job outside.
besides,i wanted to use the time wisely to improve on thyself.
in terms of physical and mental aspect.
there's loads of room for improvement.
LOADS.

currently waiting for chin to emerge from the army
hoping for him to be more 'buffed-up' and stronger
ok that's what he hopes too.
it doesnt matter if he doesnt;
cus i am dragging him to run with me.
Valentine's day is coming
and so is my bdae
i wonder how i will spend the 2 days.
my bdae will be a lil sad,
as he will be back in army again
tekong must travel by ship..
so far =(

anyhow,i feel tired again.Time for a lil nap on my comfy bed
then it's time for my cooking lesson
from mummy.
hahaha kk toodles.

2009-02-02T22:03:00.002+08:00

i learnt cooking from my mum today =))
picked up a few basics:
1)Wash and pluck vege
2)Crack and beat eggs
3)Chop up tomatoes
4)Use knife to peel the chestnut
5)I get to stir fry too =))
very happy.lol shall picked up more things next time =D
too bad today she didnt have much time to let me try out on everything.
But it's ok.yay

2009-01-24T00:46:00.003+08:00

ok i changed the blog skin..

feeling extremely random..bahh i just wish that we could really spend more time tgt.
sometimes it's just really not that easy to reach u.
i understand fully.
just i can't help being a lil sad sometimes too.=(
i am reading up on marx-the guy who philosophizes and came up with the whole idea of communism.
Communism is actually a system that comes about after socialism(which still comprises of ranks and hierarchy)...and marx was actually inspired by this guy called frederick hegel.
i was just surprised by the fact that he's actually poor throughout his whole life,getting exiled from russia and brussels.and all his 4 children died from malnutrition and poor health..his works and theories became known after he died.
i dunno why i am actually blogging bout this.i think i am just bored.But i think he's a great guy.he did change the world afterall.
sounds familiar?
ah randomness ...

2007-08-31T08:45:00.000+08:00

SEVEN QUALITIES I WANT IN A POTENTIAL PARTNER:

must be nice,humorous,engaging and fun lol (that's four lumped into one but i don't care)

must love music too.=)

must have a unique character

must be able to tahan my suanings,childishness,pmsing and bad temper

must have ultra patience

must love me

And i have to love him too.=D

SEVEN THINGS THAT SCARE ME:

death

worms..(a caterpillar fell on my skirt when i was p4--and i thought it was a leaf)

losing him..

haunted mansions -.-

getting into trouble with mr tong (lol that's random..joking)

tickles

oh the reflection in the mirror hahaha

SEVEN RANDOM SONGS:

people change by rockapella

love me by collin rayes

first love by utada hikaru

tears in heaven

burning love (my organ piece)

czardas

carmen fantasy by bizet

SEVEN THINGS I LIKE MOST:

music as long as it's nice

ice cream

sleeping...zzz

chatting,laming and suaning

twinkle twinkle lil stars lol

blogging (that's a lie =p)

my organ =D

SEVEN IMPORTANT THINGS IN MY BEDROOM:

my bed--comfy soft and sleep inducing lol

my computer

my house phones (there's 3 in my room)

my portable breakfast table (which i do work on my bed lol)

my radio

my aircon

all my soft toys and books

SEVEN RANDOM FACTS ABOUT ME:

i play the organ and violin

i make animal noises randomly

i have fluctuations of mood

i am not a shopping type and i rarely shop

i eat vegetables

i watch mystery and action packed movies/cartoons

i am a girl

THINGS I PLAN TO DO BEFORE I DIE:

learn more life skills and new things

go on a tour around the world

get married and have kids

successful in my career (whichever it may turn out to be)

save the world -.-

live happily ever after

and die under the nightsky

SEVEN THINGS I CAN DO:

i can play the organ and the violin

i can play badminton,pool and bowling

i can read your mind lol

i can act like a normal human

i can stone and keep quiet for several hours

i can do foot reflexology

i can be demanding and unreasonable lol

SEVEN THINGS I SAY MOST:

I don't know.

huh?oh no.

anything, up to you.

rawr.

boo.

good morning and good night.

love you

SEVEN CELEBRITY CRUSHES

from dunman high

from tjc

from chamber

from debates

from __/07

from maths tuition class

from the face of planet earth lol

SEVEN PEOPLE I WANT TO DO THIS:

kangqi

mingshuan

berenice

amos

kongmeng

gwen

huiyi

2007-05-29T18:49:00.000+08:00

Thanks to chin for the flowers...u rock =D..

And here's a thanks to all the pple who have come down to support pas de deux!u guys rock!

2007-05-29T18:39:00.000+08:00

chin, me and wm!

me,ori and amos..xD

me and chin..u rock =D

me and wynne!

tralala..hail to jacksparrow aka fellow qm!

2007-05-29T18:24:00.000+08:00

Me and my sis...xD

Berenice and i

jobi and i

quartermasters!lol

quartermasters 2!

pas de deux chamber concert 27may 07..

2007-04-29T18:47:00.000+08:00

I am thinking..
I still am.
But now i may do something out of the norm.

it all depends really..i just need more time to think it through so that i won't regret my decision later..
And that it's something i have to be sure of.
Yet not be disillusioned and stay faithful to my beliefs.

Other than that,i believe things shouldnt change.
And people shouldnt too.

We all are fighting towards the same goal.

Unify us as one please.

hear my pleas.

2007-04-26T22:29:00.000+08:00

silence is the loudest scream.
and how true this is.

I walked and walked...
along this road where i see no end.

but i finally found peace.
where i seeked solace.

listen to the silence scream.

2007-04-17T22:01:00.000+08:00

I am totally worn out.
SYF is just approaching in 2 days time..
Precious time is left.=(
i am crossing my fingers
hoping that things will go the way we want it.
still,it's up to us to do our best.
Live life with no regrets that is.

and today on the bus ride home
there's this middle aged woman who's covering her face with magazine and taking up two seats..
she didnt want to get off the bus..
and i somehow i overhead the conversation between the bus driver and another passenger
that it's not the first time it happened.
the bus came to a standstill;another bus driver boarded and tried to persuade her to get off..
she didnt speak and instead clutched on tightly to her magazine
shielding her face from him..
i was just sitting directly behind her..
and i didnt know what to do as well.
So i decided to get off the bus.
I saw her face at the glass window
for a moment i really wanted to cry.
just felt really sad by looking at her.
I don't know why i felt that way
But it's just not just a feeling of sympathy.
It just came to my mind that something must have happened to her
something devastating even..
and the sad part was she was alone.
i really felt guilty bout not being able to do anything..
I could only watch her yet do nothing.
But I pray for her to be fine..sigh

ok what's with me?I don't know.But i feel that i am a failure as a person-hating,irritating,evil,selfish..etc.i am sorry...

really.

2007-04-07T13:11:00.000+08:00

The feeling of butterflies-
Dancing a waltz in my stomach
They just simply adore prancing around;
All light footed and flutterwinged.

Hereby where i leave my foot imprints
Standing in the myriad of purple and green
In Flanders where the field of poppies grow
Between the crosses row by row.

I hear the whisper of the wind
Creating a symphony with the rustle of the leaves.
I feel the soft soothing breeze
Sweeping past me with a sneeze.

I closed my eyes and started to think
If only u were here with me,
To embrace the tranquility and peace
To enjoy the serenity and its scenery.

If only you would leave with me,
And make our escapade from the city
Away from all the hustle and bustle
Of the hectic lifestyle we have to lead.

If only you would walk with me,
Along this path of no return
Embarking on the journey of never-ending
And even if the prospect may seem bleak.

If only you would stay with me,
With no pre-empts and take the risk .
Ask:When will we ever settle down
And when will we be free?

What would your answer be
If you truly loved me?

2007-04-01T19:55:00.000+08:00

The sweet venegance of evil,
The bitter aftertaste of life.
The blandness of the water,
The sour tinge of jealousy hides.

The deep ocean with shaded blue,
The wide acre with lush greenery.
The moon with the silvery lining,
Life is everything from black to white.

The screeching hyenas clouding the sky,
The impatient blaring of the horns pitching high.
Away in one corner of the other earth lies another
Soft hues of the violin evoking a sad sigh.

The prickly thorns that bleed,
The sharp pointy edge of the knife that slicks.
As a stark contrast to the soft and cuddly bear
That always lulls you into sleep.
~

what is life really about anyway?Here's something for us all to fathom about...But it doesnt really matter all now does it?Treasure the present,reminiscence the past,and embrace the future.

I love life to the core =)

2007-03-25T19:23:00.000+08:00

I don't care whatever things that may happen
I don't really want to bother myself with those things.
I don't think i want to get myself involved in any shit
I don't want to be wallowing in self-pity.

It just all came as a concidence,and even too good a timing
Until the point that i cant even believe it myself even.
Is this all god's will,or it's just the fate's prevail
Something that i can't and will never escape?

I thought everything was out of goodwill
I imagined everything you said to be real
I never even once doubted your sincerity
And now you're telling all this arent true.

I don't want to know that what i believed in was wrong
I don't want to be deceived and yet be the last to find out.
I don't want to be helpless with my flialing limbs
I don't want to be sad because of you.

Is everything just too late
To the point of no return,
Or it's just that it's been like this all this while
I have myself to blame for this plight?

Damn it.I hate myself now.

2007-03-25T11:59:00.000+08:00

Everything just goes up in a wisp of smoke
Nothing's left;not even dust or ashes.
The excruciating pain that pierces
Searing through my heart.

I chose to believe,
I chose to trust.
I chose my own beliefs
And i chose the wrong choice.

Gone were the days of happiness
Encroaching upon us now was a mere fleeting shadow
Of jealousy,hatred and suspicion
Enclosing us in our individual invisible spheres.

It's not entirely your fault
Nor anyone's else
I just feel like a complete idiot
For failing to see the grotesque side of truth.

Yet again,there's always a silver lining
At least that's what i hope.
Maybe things have an inner meaning we fail to foresee
And the past,present,future are not that bleak.

Prove us wrong,
Earn yourself justice.
Win over our trust,
Make us admit defeat.

Will things return to what they were,
Or they were never pretty from the start?

2007-03-14T12:48:00.000+08:00

Aim,snap and fall.

That's why the illusionary strands arent meant to bear the weight of falling dreams.
Everything seems so weighty and heavy at that instant
And it goes crumbling down with all that rubble.

I don't see why some things are beyond our control
I don't understand why some things are beyond our reach
I don't comprehend why some things are beyond our means
But i won't accept all these reasons that point to why.

Working my way through the rubble
Trying to gasp for a mouthful of air in between the pants
The glimmer of hope i am trying to seek seems to flicker
But the dreams i sought to weave will never waver.

Enshrouded by the horrors caving in
Surrounded by the darkness swallowing me
Bounded by the entanglement of threats and dangers
I am still a living entity,unfazed by all the fears.

And that's just me.Accept me for what i am
If not just take your leave and i won't intervene.
No point having deceits and detestable lies
Face up to the reality and truth-with your head high.

2007-03-11T16:24:00.000+08:00

orientation ended last night =D
On the 2nd day of orientation,there was chamber pdp performance.^_^ chamber just rocks lar..we played czardas,bratja and fotbb again.Just that there were more pple in the audi this time round-so we can promote chamber better lol.But then,the keyboard sucks like hell.Firstly the sustaining kept slipping off my feet and i had to try to grip it between my feet..so that it doesnt slide off the stage somewhat.And becos of that pedal,i couldnt concentrate on playing..so i sorta screw up the piano.But then again,the sound produced from the amplifier was so muffled and loud that it screwed up the whole song of bratja lar.-.- sorry pple..overall bratja was screwed.lol..czardas was good thanks to chin again..and fotbb is the combined effort of chin and cy which received a loud applause from the audience.great job guys you all rock the house down that time..we will have more pple joining chamber and nat wont have to be the lonely soul during sectionals anymore..=p

then went chamber room to rest.Didnt exactly have a good rest last night anyway..but i shant mention too much details here.On the 3rd day,there's this talent quest-they announced it in the hall.I didnt noe how it would be related to me in any way,but it did.gosh.lol me and phyllis were walking to the piano there-cos i wanted to use the piano for awhile.and i saw chin and patrick and a few bunch of scip n ogls there..ended up me and chin played czardas again.For old times sake..hahaha.So pple started to record the music-and we repeated it a few times over and over again..-.-.Then patrick's fotbb super pro on the piano-collaborated with chin on the violin=totally wow.and we formed a trio:BON-BONS.I am from blazon,chin from orexus and pat from nyrah.Sorry dooga..lol.I will never forget the introduction video,here's what happened:

me:i am weiting from blazon
chin:i am jincheng from orexus
pat:i am patrick from nyrah.
me:i am bon.
chin:i am bon-bon
pat:i am bon-bon-bon!
chin:Together, we are..
All:BON-BONS!
me:why do we like tjc?cos' i like the T!
chin: i like the J!
pat: i like the C!
All:so we like TJC!

i swear i will nv forget this my entire life.It was the stupidest thing we ever did..lol.And chin still couldnt believe it when we left the slc..hahahaha.but come to think of it,quite funny lar.how many times do you get to do this in your entire life?but probably none.So we can all live without any regrets now.btw,i oso formed a group with the blazon pple-called bubblegummers!hahaha..here's the credits to them all as well:bingyih,ivan,matthew,desmond..and not to forget ryan!u guys rock too,really.It's been a great time noeing u all =D
~
okie.had to rush to yamaha after the whole day..stupid music fest.Didnt go bonding dinner with my clan pple,sorry guys once again.and then as i was having my dinner at bk,i received a sms that shocked me.We got to prepare an encore piece just in case,and guess what?Both me and chin tot of using bond's explosive.JINX.lolol...it concided with our group's name (bon-bons) and his fren got the score.Only thing was we had to sort everything out in one morning.NOTE:It's morning and not night,cos chin could only send me at 1 am during the wee hours of the day.hahahaha..so i tried to figure out the keyboard part for pat,and i had to practise e violin 2 part.all the way until 330 am-my whole family slept very late in fact.No one turned in until 2 am-cos we were moving the stuffs out of the room into the pathetic study room.On sat there will be pple coming to change grilles and windows =x..

anw,next morning reached sch at 9 i think.practised the songs at the hall,afterwhich chin had to go for this debates and pat went back to his sec sch.I stayed there throughout practically-practised with the bubblegummers for quite a while.lucky i don't have to sing-i played the violin instead =) and so blah blah blah..it's time for o' nite.

i couldnt register anything in my head anyway..nothing seems to process in my head.Like a total blank-the aftermath of too much music.hahaha..same goes for chin.Stoning look on his face =p patrick was the one who should be energetic-still alive and kicking cos he slept at 1030
and me and chin,all slept after 3am.it's like.....-.-".Anyway,bubblegummers was the 2nd item.so we went on stage..then for moment i hear alot of cheers.hahaha..got pple cheer for me.YAY..lol then ivan later tell me i have a fan base.i was like 0.o..hahaha.thanks anyway pple!and must oso thank the bubblegummer members!thanks to desmond for being the singer,it takes alot of courage.Thanks to bingyih for forking out the time and making it a point to practise with us,thanks for the great guitar playing as well.Same goes for ivan =D and to matthew,you're a good percussionist.

ok so i went back into the hall after tat to join pat and chin.We patiently waited inside the hall for our introduction video.We covered our faces cos it's quite embarrassing.hahaha but the performance was awesome!totally standing ovation(according to chin)!--THANKS CHIN and PAT!u 2 really rock the whole house down lar! =) esp the fotbb u two really made it a great success.Even dooga cheered for us ok!lolol..only drawback is:u all not gonna have anymore privacy.Esp chin lol so watch out for paparazzi and fans =D oh yeah.they sprayed the dry ice like 2 or 3 times..for a moment i looked up onto stage,it's not just a mere talent quest-its more like a concert performance.A platform for us to seek what we pursued,not for money not for fame-but it's the burning interest and passion for music that we all hold so dearly.And at that moment,my heart skipped a beat.i swear.

WE WON!hahaha.And we played our bond's explosive.I was worried bout my part b4 dat-but managed to scratch it out lar.It marks the end of the talent quest,and what i can say is:It's been a great experience for us and i don't think i will ever forget that night.Thanks chin and patrick once again-for everything u all did to make it possible.The legacy of BON-BONS shall prevail!and we gave out the prize to others-imagine us eating all the whole load of stuffs-we will become boms boms lar.hahahahaha!omg..i still cant believe that we managed to create such a miracle in one night.excellent job guys!

and here's a dedication to chin:Thank you for everything that u have done for chamber and for this talent quest.It's a chain reaction:From lunchtime concert to pdp performance and to talent quest.Yet,despite all the whole load of stuffs u have gotten yourself into,u gave all your best.U never once broke the promise and spend sleepless nights trying to make it right and perfect.We all owe you a big thank you for all the sacrficies u have made-and you are truly a great violinist and musician.Not becos of your skills or techniques,not becos we won the talent quest-but becos of your passion for music and all this while u continue to pursue music not in the name of fame-u continue to remain humble and calm/composed.I salute to you for that =) it's not a easy feat.u totally rock and thanks once again.

2007-02-27T16:38:00.000+08:00

I am drowning in a carousel of thoughts once again..It seems never-ending,does it?Similar to that of a bottomless pit.

Seriously i think i am beginning to lose the rigour and the enthusiasm in the things around me.Ok maybe except for chamber ensemble.=)Setting apart from that,i am beginning to isolate myself from people.Maybe it's a "i just want to be alone" syndrome.Beats me,but my mouth just don't feel like speaking up.And i don't like to mutter under my breath,so i literally remain unnoticed in a social circle.It's either that i don't feel like talking,or i am just lacking of sleep.But there's an underlying factor to this syndrome:Perhaps i have undertaken a change in attitude towards life,and decide to be more rational rather than intuitive.All along i have been telling myself that one must have a postive outlook,but i think it aint that bad viewing life from a different perspective.Not that i have become pessismistic,but momentarily i felt as if i have been living life under a shadow.Come to think of it, as chengying has said,it's very weird for person to socialise too much.He also observed that i can be quiet and private at times,and i don't realy smile alot.hahaha.k lar quite true i guess.that's me underneath that facade.I tink i have always been like that,just that it is beginning to show out more lately..And the crappy lameo me is starting to diminish.Sometimes it resurfaces again,but only at times when i become really hyped up.=)

But i guess the only drawback to this:My interaction with people is adversely affected.Since i cant come up with lame tricks hidden under the sleeves;nor can i think of really something intriguing to discuss about-due to my limited scope of knowledge and experiences.sigh.Is this change good or bad?Maybe it's not really a change,it's just that my emotions show out more now,and i am not afraid of sending signals to people that:i am not exactly in the good mood to talk or i just don't feel like talking,sorry.I think we humans do get tired after a prolonged period of time.

i guess dats all for now.And chin has caused me to be interested in chiromancy aka palmistry.Actually all along i have been interested in the areas of horoscopes and palmistry,just that he incidentally triggered off this spark of interest once again.

gotta get out of the hub now..time to head for home.ciaos

2007-02-13T19:10:00.000+08:00

Long time since i came.anyway i was darn too busy.zzz

new school,new environment,new people,new year,new things but stil the same old me.Trying my best to fit in,and trying to be friendly to everyone and even trying to be happy sometimes.But sometimes i really just don't feel like it.I just want to be alone and just give me some peace and quietness please.or maybe i don't even noe what i want.and frankly,i dont want to be lonely as well.

quite confusing now.The definition of friends seems bleak.Those times with you guys were really great-but now it's like gone forever.As we all separate into our own ways,things were never the same..and in fact for pple whom i always keep in contact with in school,things are also different now.There will come to a certain point where everything will just die off and it marks the end to the friendship.The awkwardness already exists and even though i try to brush it off,it still bugs me.I hate this kind of feeling-but maybe i am responsible for such a change of things..but i don't like it at all.

there seems to be much unhappiness between the pple arnd me lately.I don't really like it either,i mean why cant we just let live?maybe things would have been much simpler liddat.i wish we could all go back to the past but it's virtually impossible.People change,everyday,change like you,like all the time in the world.But we cant help it,and it doesnt help even if i am emo and sad like this.But really can get a control over myself.

Just sent gwen off to australia yesterday night,managed to meet up with meiyi,jiayin and huishan.I didnt cry when she left,cos i noe she will be back for hols and hopefully by next year.if not it will be 4 long years of study over there..i miss dhs mates.those from 2j like jiayin,huishan,jinci,jona,joey,oxy,gwen and 4B peeps.phamelia and alot others-we all went through so much tgt and i will rmb 4B for life as well.Its legacy shall continue.Believe in yourself-overcome the extreme.the 4B chalet,take 5,interclass competitions,classroom challenge and all our teachers and our time tgt studying in the 4B classroom-i really miss it loads.Dunno,now mind is just in a disarray and myriad of thoughts.

sometimes i wonder what i am pursuing is really what i want, or i am just going with the flow.Or should i really reconsider what i really want and go ahead with my own choice even though it may be different from my peers.Yet i am also afraid of not fitting in once more.Cos beneath that strong front of mine-maybe i am just weeping inside.

My life sucks..fuck it.i don't care much bout vulgarities now-at least for now anyway.argh.it's so confusing that i don't think i even want bother about it anymore.U all just do whatever u want.

2006-11-16T21:30:00.000+08:00

It marks the beginning of hell; and now it signifies its end.No more poring over books nor burning midnight's oil.The stress in the past is now a stark contrast to what we are having now-hell loads of fun,and more fun!Bid farewell to the mugging days,instead please welcome the new season of joy.Embrace the arms of mother nature;slow down your footsteps for once to appreciate the beautiful things around you.It may be just a mere smile,a flower,a soft chime of the clock tower-yet it's all these very trivial matters that we tend to neglect.They actually consitute a very significant and important part of our lives.Take a step back people-this is the very place that we all live in.

16 november-i will remember this day till a long time.It's the end of o's!!!omg.Yet maybe we are too accustomed to e mugging days-that it sorta feels weird that everything's over.You can even burn all the papers if you want.then it suddenly dawned upon me that 2006 is coming to an end.The 2 years spent with the 4B peeps just went past in a twinkling of an eye;yet sad to say we havent had a decent class outing yet.It's also very sad to know that andy and calvin are leaving for overseas next year;whether we get to see them again it depends on fate.Probably 10 years down the road we will get invitation to their weddings!=D that would really be nice le sia.lol.There's like so much things to say;so much things to do yet so precious little time left with the class people.Over the past 2 years our class shares a kind of bond;and we unite as a class.Whether it's take 5 or interclass-those were really great moments shared together.Spurring each other on;sweating hard and striving towards the goal;there were tears and laughter etc.4B has a reverse trend-guys >girls.But nevertheless,4B people-u guys rock!haha.Thanks for making our class such a fun loving,jovial,enthusiastic one-maybe at first we werent putting our heart and soul into doing something tgt,but i think that this year we became closer as a big family.So to each and every of you-i wish you all the best in ur future endeavours and hope you will remember yourself as part of 4B.

Believe in yourself-overcome the extreme~

This will be something i remember for as long as i live.

There are a zillion things for me to complete right now.Such as clearing up the mess in my room,practising for organ performances,catching up with old pals,chalets to attend,go shopping,crash down at arcade,scream my head off riding the roller coaster,overseas trip with family,concerts to attend,ice skating,ball games,and not forgetting to experiment with new clothes and stuffs.So as you see,the holidays gonna be packed.No time to lose-enjoy the hols ppl!It's time for us to break loose and create hell-that sounds wrong.lol.

Cheers.

2006-10-28T20:48:00.000+08:00

yeah.I am back with my feathers unruffled.

Ok maybe not.Been too busy lately.With all the studying..But i am putting too much focus on maths!!Oh no..my sciences are gg to suffer at this rate.Chem prac coming on tues..GG!Gotta buck up on that.Considering the other two pracs are crazy.lol.But i am proud of my maths.=DD.i completed quite a lot of other sch exam papers.And i am gg to keep doing those until maths exams finish.Cos i realise we will 'lose engine' if we do not warm up everyday.Just like what happened to me the other time.-.-"

and i guess everything is settled.All the happenings just sorta vaporised.if you noe wad i mean.Great that everything has just gone back to normal.Just like the way it was before i even met you.hahaha.Which is a great start afterall.I am amazed.Whee.So sian..more studying to be done.Studying studying and more studying.But maths rock.Do not even attempt to talk me out of it.=DD.i love maths to bits.and bits and pieces.gosh i am crazy..lol.ok..i am gg study chemistry and languages now.Putting aside maths for the moment..=( my beloved maths.sigh.lolololol.And must thank twig for helping me solve all my maths questions.Everytime got problem sure consult him one.Arigato twig!dun snap!=DD.

gahh.so boring day.more hectic studying to be done.And oh yeah,tmr there's organ lesson again!after one month of ponning -.-" lol.

2006-10-24T18:22:00.000+08:00

Woah.I just realised it's a long time since i blogged.Been too caught up with stuffs lately.Alot of studying to be done-and there's a pact between me and my god brudda.We have to score A1s for o'levels.And i accepted the challenge.I was forced to anyway-left with no choice.Cos if i dun do well he will flop his exams for the first half of the year next year.

Well,i seriously didnt noe i could influence him that much.Unknowingly as well.He looked up to me as role model-yet i reflect upon myself and dun find myself worthy of his respect.But now becos of what he said,i will try doubly hard this time for o's.You reap what u sow.that's what ppl always say.And that's true of cos.i mean like..u put in this much effort that's what u will get in return.So why not just do your best for this exam and we can play like hell later?Yes that shld be the case.

So many things that happened.I am just tired of everything.Tired of trying.Tired of waiting.Tired of being myself.So that shld be the case isnt it?Even if i am really feeling down and out,pissified,angry,attitude problem-i cant show it out.No i must keep to myself.That's what i always been doing.Trying to mantain this kind of cheerfulness,when sometimes i really do actually want to vent it all out.I am a human too alright?I do have emotions.Most of the time i am alright.I dont'get angry or become ap.But when i do,i wish that ppl would uds n at least show some concern.From this,i now see everything all so clearly.Who are the ppl who truely cared;and those who dun even give a damn.

No doubt it was my fault.Being the one ap-ing.So i am sorry bout it-tried to apologise and admit that it was my fault.But ok,aside from the other time u appeared to be nonchalant.That made me even more frustrated.Like it was no big deal so if we dun talk.Yeah.actually it was no big deal.and i dunno why i am so affected by it anyway.Coming to think of it i am the one being all childish and stupid and dumb.Now i find myself really silly.I didnt used to be like this.Feel like going insane.But it was still my fault.So i tried to salvage the situation.But hell no.It's another disappointment for me.No response again.I am tired of trying.Everything's futile.So why even try and waste efforts?No one will pity you for it.

everything is just plain dumb i guess.It stemmed from the most trivial thing.Yet i made a mountain out of a molehill.Maybe in the future such a thing will probably happen too.Oni thing is it happened now.So i guess there's no way to turn back.But we all gotta move on.I worry bout it for a few days-then i just realised i am the one being sad that's all.The person wont care.Making myself down doesnt solve things anyway.Yet i treasured this friendship.Trying my best to hold on and do my part in salvaging the situation-but as time wore on,i think i will just buckle under.I will probably just give up later.Cos it's hurting enough.

so much for all the melancholy.Time to snap myself out of it.Jiayou bah penguin!

2006-10-12T20:16:00.000+08:00

Let's countdown to one week.And it will be the first paper for o's-Biology practical.>.<

I try to think of the brighter side-what i will do after o's.So here's a list:

1) Get a new wardrobe-preferable come up with some style
2) Pierce ears (still trying to 'bully' my parents into it)
3) Get contact lenses (still attempting to make my parents see light of the truth)
4) learn cooking, singing and dancing..(weird combination sia.)
5) crash course at arcade
6) learn roller blading
7) travel around singapore- go escape,sentosa,zoo etc.
8) catch up with old friends and teachers
9) come up with own composition of songs and lyrics
10)workout at gym
11)play basketball,badminton,volleyball,bowling n pool
12)go overseas during hols with my family (beijing this year hmm)
13)class chalet!
14)prom nite?Anyone interested to go for the 30 nov mariott hotel one?65 bucks.
15)use comp all day long without my dad popping along to see wad i am doing online
16)chatting on msn and on phone so that my bill can soar high and break record
17)make more friends and enlarge my social circle
18)sleep 12 hours a day so as to make up for the ones i lacked during exams
19)get ready for yamaha festival =D
20)to find a boyfriend.(lol joking.this is to fill up the last empty column -.-)

ok this is enough to cheer me up and spur me on to do more intensive study.Go penguin, why are you still at the comp?Shoo!

2006-09-24T22:38:00.000+08:00

This blog is revamped.Renewed.Refurnished.And it has a legacy that continues.

I have deleted all the past entries-and everything's going to start from scratch once again.Everything's gonna start anew and fresh,and this time round i am going to start a new story of my own.

cheers to the re-opening of this blog.=D